Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Too Many Sweets, Attempt 2

Okay, I began writing a post about the Christmas season, and how essentially it was a season designed to test the family bonds, and really, to see how long it takes for family members not to kill each other. The previous blog definitely had better wording. The reason why I had to abort the post? Family members busting in, and you don't really want them reading about you complaining about family. And my sister, sharing a room with me, complaining about how loud I'm typing. I digress. The testing of these bonds is even more trying in Germany where every day is a fucking holiday and so shops and stores are closed, keeping you in the confines of your home. Everyone becomes a claustorphobic. It becomes even more trying when I'm positive that each of my family members, except for my step-mom, so essentially my blood line, suffer from narcissitic personality disorder. Except me, of course. Though, I think this blog is rather narcisstic, so. You decide. But I do believe my family members could be diagnosed. And perhaps treated. This is my beginning random rant. It's been too long. Why are the holidays so many? Why are the shops always closed? Today was the first day in freedom since noon on Friday. Which I guess wouldn't be that long for nice, normal, empathetic people.

On to my original post. There are way, way, too many different Christmas sweets that are just superfulous to the normal sweets available in Germany. I mean ther are special cakes, cookies, well in terms of dessert that is about it, but there are of course other types of food. The worst part is that these desserts are addictive.

The biggest offender, and most addictive are these Dresdner Domino Steiner. I mean they are these small pockets of heaven. They are these small squares with three layers. The bottom layer is the Christmas cookie of lebkuchen, the second layer is this fruit jelly which I have no fucking clue what it is, and the top layer is marzipan. And then it is covered in choclate. The total size is about a centimeter and a half cubed. I mean seriously, they are addictive. I look forward to them every holiday season. I mean I can't even describe how good they are.

The problem? You can eat an entire packet at once. There has never been an incidence of eating just one. The only time? If there is one left. My sister and I have been plowing through packets. Actually typing about it right now is making me a little ill.

The other reason I'm feeling a little sick? We stocked up on gummis today while shopping because we didn't have any over the weekend. So I think that we had about two, one-pound bags. I'm still ill thinking about it. Essentially between my sister, brother and I. Well my dad had some too, but I believe his eating was negligble.

I can fucking feel the sugar coursing through my veins. I don't know if it actually is blood anymore. I think it's all sucrose. I'm suprised I'm not going through insulin shock yet. It's as if I'm trying my own self-medication of schizophrenia or something.

And seriously? There's nothing else to do when the stores are closed than to eat your way through the apartment, dodging family members as often as you can. Because seriously? They talk over each other becuase they like to hear themselves speak. Someone is going to be drowning in their own reflection this holiday.

Update: I fucking love the cheesy workout song. "Call on Me," or something similar. It fucking rocks. Still watching music channels to try and find the new Kylie video. Someone in programming must have been listening because yesterday or the day before, because it all blurs together, there was an uninterrupted live Kylie concert on. I turned it on while she was singing "Can't Get You Outta My Head," and I was again like, I know! And then I remembered with the next song that "Slow" is a fucking hot song.

Dear Germany,
Please place a limit on the amount of sugar a person can buy at one time. It will benefit the sanity of many.
Thanks,
Karen

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

you crack me up.

Anonymous said...

Please don't tell me you're getting sick of Haribo gummies!