Sunday, June 07, 2009

nph, your pants are so shiny!

Seriously, NPH (Neil Patrick Harris for those not in the know, or Barney on HIMYM, or for the even less knowledgeable, Dr. Doogie Howser himself) - your pants/suit is so bloody shiny, and might be the gayest thing about you.

I love NPH, and have loved you for years, but what the fuck were you thinking hosting the Tony (or is it TONY?) awards in a suit that could serve as a mirror to everyone you talk to for the rest of the night? Or perhaps you wanted to be the shiniest object in the room, and the Tonys are probably the gliziest awards show?

I gave you the benefit of doubt. I actually though that the pants were going to be ripped off and you were going to join one of the performances. But alas. I've been watching for two and a half hours (shockingly. I'm always surprised how if I turn on the show from the start that I can't stop watching it. It's weird. I can't quite explain it, especially considering I've not seen any of the shows that are nominated this year.) and..you're still in the suit.

Why NPH? Whhyy? I love you to death, you seem like the most charming person in the world and like you'd be awesome to go out and get a drink with (it seems that you wouldn't drink beer), and you'd sing and tell stories and do magic tricks and generally charm the pants off of me. I'd only hope that maybe I could be one of your fag hag girls. Yet...your boyfriend, your friends, and I'm assuming the producers etc. actually let you out on stage in that suit. Yet. You're so cute that I laughed at all of your jokes tonight. Even the ones that fell flat. Sigh. I have such a huge girl crush on you. I still remember having an even bigger actual crush on you after reading the article in People sophmore year in college where you had that show with the guy from Monk. And I thought you were so hot and had totally grown-up since Doogie Howser that I watched that show. A) I should have known right then. And B) Clearly this is a trend I have continued since I started watching the show this evening because you were hosting.

Granted the start power of the evening didn't hurt (Hello Rizzo! You're my favourite C.J. Craigg! [Seriously. I'm in love with Allison Janney. For "Drop Dead Gorgeous" alone, and then of course, the "West Wing."], Kristin Chenowith charmed the pants off me in "Pushing Daisies" so she can do no wrong...and pretty much everyone.)

Staying on the channel is pretty impressive considering the really good NBA Finals game going on as well. I think it has to do with my obsession with the music. And I'm always charmed to see people win and get overwhelmed by the honor. The girl Karen Orveida (sp?) who won best supporting actress essentially for her role in "West Side Story" was so shocked that she was crying the whole time and had to be led off stage because she couldn't speak anymore. Which is so funny and touching because you could tell when she gave the "wassup" kind of reaction to the camera was on her that you could tel she was sure there was no way in hell that she was winning. I totally love that completely flabbergasted, speechless reaction.

Sigh. Why don't I see more Broadway shows? I fucking love musicals and plays. Oh. That's right. $$$.

Though after watching the cutest boys ever do "Billy Elliott" - his dancing was fucking out-of-control - I might need to sell a kidney so I can purchase a nose-bleed ticket. It's amazing how talented these boys are (all 3 of them won for best actor). So cute. Just wante to squeeze their cheeks. And their reaction to winning was just adorable.

Plus! Chandra Wilson is going to be in Chicago? Good Lord Sweet Jesus. Maybe, just maybe, this is what God invented credit for.

Why don't they pay for blood anymore? Seriously. No. Seriously.