the smell of laundry turns me on.

Before you judge, let me explain.

Smell is my strongest sense. Seriously. It's as if I didn't have one of my five senses and so my sense of smell was heightened. I can recognize perfumes with people walking by, often when others wouldn't even notice the perfume or cologne. Earlier this week as I was asking my boss about my time off to go to visit my mom, I noticed she was wearing a new scent, and asked if it was "Chance" by Chanel. She didn't know because it was a sample, and so went looking. It was one of those moments, where I was like, um, I was asking and now it's weird because you're digging through your gym bag. Turns out I was right. She was duly impressed. I was duly embarassed for inadvertently making it this huge thing.

My heightened olfactory sensitivity is most likely the reason why I am so obsessed with perfumes, and yes, I know. I sometimes will spray too much in the beginning, but it's fine by the time I get to work or wherever I am. I mean it's the reason I get compliments on how I smell, right? Just as I do when I'm not wearing a watch, I feel naked without perfume on. One time in college we were all going out to dinner and someone forgot something, as I realized I forgot to spray perfume, or we were looping around or something, but I remember that I made my friend pull over so I could run back in the dorm and spritz on perfume. My friend was nice enough to indulge me, but I know she thought I was crazy and slightly annoyed. I didn't care, I just felt better when I put it on.

When I find a scent of something that I really, really like I can't get enough of it. I'll practically shove my face in it and take massive sniffs. I went on a trip for my rehearsal dinner outfit with annoying girl and she made me stop by Neiman's to see about getting her Reef's for the summer. I realized that I hadn't sprayed perfume and so I was trying to find a scent to quickly spritz on. The sales people were overzealous. Neiman's. And so I grabbed the nearest bottle, did a quick check to make sure it wasn't obnoxious and sprayed it on. I found out like 30 minutes later as we were in the car how much I loved the scent. I kept on putting my wrist up to my nose and taking a deep whiff. I went home and looked online at Neiman's for like 2 hours, because I at least remembered the shape of the bottle. I thought I may have found it, but was all, I should definitely go to Neiman's and make sure. I made it back a few weeks later with CBF and the we were unable to find the correct bottle or scent. I was crushed.

The scent of Aqua di Gio for men drives me wild. I would crush a teddy bear if it was wearing the scent. I've found guys more attractive just for wearing it. I mean, people I wouldn't necessarily find attractive at all. Just because they're wearing it. Sometimes I will smell the trail of it in my hallway or of the person in front of me. I know, my olfactory skillz are freakishly strong.

So as I was on my way to Giant on Sunday to pick up my bus pass, I could smell the laundry along the route. Sunday being the natural laundry day, and apartments cluttering my walk to Giant. The wind being expelled by the dryers was fucking awesome. I mean it's clearly mostly softener that makes that smell, but I love it. I kept on taking big whiffs, and being all, man that fucking smells good. Cologne is a big turn on, but if they smelled like fresh laundry that would also for me be a big turn on. As a side note though, I think actually doing laundry is a total pain in the ass and hate doing it. I believe I would feel differently if I had laundry in my apartment rather than traipsing up and down two flights of stairs and down a long hallway. I always love briefly shoving my face in the pile of clothes that come out my laundry bag, that are still warm, and taking a big whiff.

I know. It's fucking bizarre.

Just on Monday, the day after I was walking along the street and having the realization that this fresh laundry smell kind of turns me on, in a reaction way of, "God this smells good," and let's take another whiff, two of my internship co-workers randomly brought up laundry. We all agreed that we didn't like to do it, but the other two were all, "It's my most hated chore!" One going on to say that she will do all the chores such as dishes and whatnot so that her partner would do the laundry. I was like, "Fuck no! Are you crazy?! Dishes and everything else is so much worse!" Well, I actually just said, "Really?" But that's because I want to keep my internship.

Fast-forward to today and I'm in CVS going to choose out new shoe inserts for my sneakers. Cheap-ass Diesel sneakers where the inserts came out promptly upon purchasing them. Okay, like 2 weeks. But. Still. And I've had the same inserts since then, which was like ages ago. It's the first time I've worn them this season, and felt it was time to get new ones. So yes. I'm gellin'. Thanks, Dr. Scholl. Anyway, so I'm swinging around and down another aisle when I stop in my tracks because I smell that awesome smell of fresh laundry slash dryer sheets. I pause briefly by the boxes and take another brief smell and am about to walk on, when I'm all, should I buy this brand considering I really enjoy it? More seemingly than others? Plus, it's CVS brand and it's a buy one get one free. I start to walk away, because really. I have both liquid softener and dryer sheets at home. But then, I start to backpedal. Maybe I can leave them in my office, leaving it smelling good? And really, can you beat a buy one, get one free? Come on Karen. Just get it.

I'm now sitting here with two boxes of CVS fabric softener, and they smell pretty good.

I know. I'm fucking strange.